By: Kari, MA, LPC, NCC
A good therapist is always working himself or
herself out of a job. In other words,
the most basic goal of therapy is to no longer need therapy. However, the therapist can only do so
much. The therapist’s role is not to
solve problems or make things better.
Unfortunately, therapists are not magicians, and there is no magic wand.
Consider physical therapy for a moment. In physical therapy, there is a
therapist. The role of the physical
therapist is to facilitate the healing process through the use of exercises,
education, and so on. Ultimately, the
work itself falls on the patient; if the patient does not do his part, then
healing will not take place. Physical
therapy can be a long and painful process, but that pain is accepted as a means
to an end. The therapist’s job is
similar to that of a coach, offering guidance, support, and encouragement
throughout the process, but if the therapist does not push the patient to stand
on his own, the patient is left leaning on the therapist.
Similarly, when a person presents to counseling,
there is a therapist. Like the physical
therapist, the role of the therapist is to facilitate the healing process
through the use of exercises, education, and so on. Again, the work itself falls on the client;
if the client does not do her part, the healing will not take place. Counseling can be a long and painful process,
but unlike physical pain, emotional pain is often avoided. However, the therapist’s job is the same,
offering guidance, support, and encouragement throughout the process. The therapist’s responsibility is to push the
client to think for herself, make her own choices, and work through her
healing. If the therapist does all the
problem-solving, the client then becomes dependent on the therapist for answers
and advice.
As a person who has worked in both physical therapy
and now mental health, I can tell you that it is difficult to watch someone
struggle, whether it be physically or emotionally. Naturally, there exists a desire to alleviate
pain within every healthcare professional.
When clients ask me what they should do, of course I wish there were
some magic words to make their pain cease.
But the truth is, it’s not my place to tell people what to do, and even
if it were, what I would do in a particular situation may be very different
from what someone else would do. What
may be helpful for me may not be helpful for someone else. What I see as a solution may be more of a
problem for someone else.
The bottom line is that
therapy takes time and effort, and I promise you that the therapist does not
have a magic wand. The clients who get
the most out of therapy are those who come in ready to participate in
self-exploration, put in the work, and move toward lasting change. Change is not easy, and it certainly can be
painful. The therapist is there to walk
with you but can only do so much. The
rest belongs to you.
